


Heartache

by DarkCorgi



Category: Harry Potter - J.K. Rowling
Genre: Drama, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-02-04
Updated: 2005-02-04
Packaged: 2018-08-11 00:51:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7868728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkCorgi/pseuds/DarkCorgi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus dreams and nearly drowns.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heartache

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally archived at [Ink Stained Fingers](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Ink_Stained_Fingers), which was created in 2002 as a home for Harry Potter slash fiction. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in January 2015. We e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this author or artist, please contact me using the e-mail address at the [Ink Stained Fingers collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/InkStainedFingers/profile).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** This story hasn’t been beta’d and all mistakes are my own.

Heartache

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_All I can do is moan as his fingers burrow deeply with in me and brushing along that special place that sets rockets off behind my eyes. As he prepares me, more like torturing me, he traces along the scar that runs from my left hip to my right nipple, the one that ploughed a path through my chest hair. My scars never seemed to bother him; in fact he worships every one. He tormented me by playing languidly with my nipples and playing with the coarse hair between them all the while still working his fingers with in me. I was incoherent with desire and he wasn't helping at all as he teased me over and over again._  
  
When I thought I would die he finally removed those torturous fingers and slowly pushed in something thicker and hotter into my well prepared channel. I did my best to force him in deeper and faster, but he wasn't cooperating with me at all. He managed to hold my hips in place and I cursed the fact that the full moon was a recent event and my body for recovering to slowly. I wanted him now and he was denying me. I made sure he knew my discontent as he slowly pushed his way in at a snail's pace. Once he was fully seated I clenched my muscles in an attempt to make him move and move fast. He still wasn't cooperating, but his mischievous laugh sent tingles down my spine. Eventually he began to move in slow shallow thrusts and I wanted to kill him. He continued his slow pace alternating between short thrusts and the long ones that drove me mad.  
  
He began to shift his angles until he brushed against my prostate, sending stars bursting before my eyes once again. As he slowly began to increase his pace I slowly began to stroke my impossibly hard cock, but the irritating man batted my hands way growling 'mine' as he did so. I whined desperation, sounding much like my monthly form just after the change. He chuckles at the sound and finally takes pity on me. He grasps my aching cock and begins to stroke. He's out of sync with his own rhythm, but I don't care. I can feel my groin tighten as he creates the friction I so desperately crave. He's rapidly hitting his own peak and I feel his breath ghosting over my chest as he moves faster and rougher. He cries out my name as he cums and soon I'm crowing his name into the night air.  
  
Sleep calls us both into her embrace and we willing surrender to her charms. I can feel his arms slipping around me just as I allow oblivion to take me. I can't wait for morning and the sight of his grey eyes framed in black hair greeting me with a smile.  
  
Morning arrives and as the early daylight burns past my eyelids I slowly regain consciousness. I turn to my left and my heart rips in two. It's empty and cold. He wasn't here. He's gone and nothing is going to bring him back. I can't hold back the tears as the pain stabs at me. I don't know why I'm here. I can't live with out him. My heart fell behind the veil with him. Why didn't I follow? No, I can't go on living with this pain. He was all I had before Lily and James died and he was all I had now. I barely survived the twelve years he was in Azkaban and now I don't think I can live alone after the two short years he was back in my life.  
  
The despair that filled me was so thick, so deep that I was unable to prevent myself from drowning in it. I haven't hit a low like this since the days just after losing him. Once that summer was over I had too much to do and other things to keep my mind away from his death. Now the pain was too overwhelming and there was nothing I could do to stop the agony from overwhelming me. I can't go on alone anymore. Between the lack of companionship and the ever tightening restrictions of the Ministry against my kind was wearing me down. There was no reason to go on and I don't know why I didn't end it earlier instead of attempting to slog on with my miserable life.  
  
Yes, I'll end it now before the pain gets any worse. I fumble blindly in the nightstand as my tears of pain blur my eyesight. I know that in this draw is a box with a silver dagger that once belonged to James. It was one of the few things Sirius had of James that escaped the Ministry's clutches when Peter framed him. It took me a while to find the box by touch alone and when I did I pulled the inlaid box out of the drawer. I lifted the lid and stared at the blade nestled in the velvet with in. I slowly reached out to grasp the blade, my mind sighing in satisfaction of the resulting complication of silver poisoning if someone attempts to save me.  
  
Just before I touch the poisonous blade a movement catches my eye. Scattered across the top of the night stand are several photos and the movement of the occupants was what caught my eye. I glanced at each of the pictures and watched them move and finally I focused on the one that truly attracted my attention through the wall of despair I was cloaked in. In the frame Sirius and I were posing along side a green-eyed youth. I realized then why I was still here.  
  
Our cub.  
  
I put the ornamental dagger back into the drawer and pulled out a vial of Dreamless Sleep instead. I remember now why I live with this pain and I now remember that I'm not alone in feeling it. I promised him that I'd watch over our green-eyed wolfling, just like he promised Lily and James all those years ago. And look after him I will.  
  
*fin*   
---|---  
 


End file.
